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Literature by WantsToLoseHerMask

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Submitted on
May 10, 2010
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20 (who?)
This Monster Hums a Sickly Sweet Tune
My heart pounds to a drumless beat
For these things that I wish I could just erase.
I falter and shatter into dandelion wishes
Blown carelessly into the wind by small children,

So innocent

(But so young,
Too young to see the pain in your eyes)

Teardrop sunsets cascade through the shooting stars,
Leaving nebula trails among unseeing eyes
That burn in the name of nothing

(For we only see what we want to see,
And what we want to see forsakes everything real)

So I shut these imaginary doors
And take heed of unsaid warnings
Spoken on gusts of ultramarine seas
And wait for the messiah

To take me home

(But I know that no messiah will come
And that home is just a euphemism for painful existence)

My nightmares are quiet, too quiet and my dreams escape with echoes of things
That I cannot begin to describe for they bring old scars to the surface
And cut my puzzle-piece soul into fractions so small they cannot be saved by sentimental hopes

(So rub salt in my open wounds and grind me into the sand;
It won't hurt it I close my eyes tight enough, it won't hurt if I just die fast enough)

The moonlight begs for a second chance
To tell the sun why they can no longer meet;
But the sun refuses, clinging onto traditions so old
That they conjure black holes and white dwarves

Into the calculation

(And the moon says to the sun, 'I'm sorry'
And the sun scoffs solar flares into her face and screams, 'you never are! You NEVER ARE!')

The soft scratching holds small doses of comfort, so rare and beautiful
That my mind whispers keep going, keep writing or you will snap into reality once more
And the gun will trigger suicide intentions

(So harsh, so harsh, you picture that moment of finality
And hold your breath until you are forced to breathe in desperation, in desperation)

So close your eyes
Fall back into the closet
Shut the door tightly
And play intricate games

With invisible monsters

(Because these invisible monsters
Are the only reason you haven't given up yet)
"This Monster Hums a Sickly Sweet Tune" is the full title
poem written by me
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TheLunaLily Featured By Owner May 17, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
All of the poems I have read here so far, this one hits closest to home, like an icy dart to the heart it was absolutely chilling to read someone else's words say what my feverish mind has thought and been to afraid to see written on paper, because then it becomes real.
I enjoyed it very much, though, it was very very good, in a terrifying way!

ashengrayskies-lit Featured By Owner May 18, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much for your kind words <3 i'm glad my poetry was able to reach you (:
i know the feeling when you read something and think wow, i couldn't have said it better myself
it's a great feeling, almost like a burden gets lifted (:
TheLunaLily Featured By Owner May 18, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for all of the favorites!
And I really did connect with your poem , it was dark but beautiful.
I am about to post a poem that you might like, it is very much when I am in the same frame of mind as when I am feeling the way your poem was speaking of.
So anyway, maybe check it out, and I hope you like it, it's not as good as yours, but at least it's 100% honest.
It's called "The Darkness Comes Calling"
Let me know what you think!

<3 <3 <3
ashengrayskies-lit Featured By Owner May 19, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
you're very welcome (: i quite enjoyed the poem, with the random song lyrics added it really added to the sorrow. honesty is the best policy i think (: wonderful job!
TheLunaLily Featured By Owner May 19, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
oh Thank you so so so much!
That means very much to me. I have not gotten much feed back here and it is starting to make me doubt myself, you know? I've read so many amazing poems and I kinda feel like I don't really belong here, but then like, every once in a blue moon, someone will comment on something, and it means so much more when they comment on a poem because my poems are so much more personal, and it makes me feel like at the very least it made sense and I was able to connect with someone else, and that is very special.
But this poem, "the Darkness Comes Calling" I wanted you to read it because of your poem that I read.
When it's the middle of the night and I'm losing my mind because I'm so depressed and I feel like I just can't take it anymore and I cry because I feel guilty and selfish and I cry because I want to be able to be selfish without having to feel guilty, and then, the darkest part of my mind that I always try to keep pushed far far back comes out and lets loose one little thought, "It would be so easy".
And all of the rational I throw back, all of the the complex reasonings I use to try to fight against it are only met with "It would be so easy".
Then, that is the only thing I think of.
So, that's what that poem is about, and after reading yours and a few others on your page as well, I thought you might relate, unfortunately :(
ashengrayskies-lit Featured By Owner May 19, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
well you know i would never wish to have someone relate with my work; but when someone does it's nice to have someone to talk to about it. you can always send me a note if you are feeling sad and i will do my best to get back to you quickly and talk to you about it when i can (:
and i can DEFINITELY relate to not getting feedback on da and thinking the writing is inadequate, it's always a struggle for me. that's why i joined so many writing groups, i was hoping that maybe someone would see my writing and have something to say, whether it's "this is good" or "this is bad" i wrote a journal months ago expressing my anger, i think it's about time to change it to something not as angry xD
TheLunaLily Featured By Owner May 20, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
You are so sweet, and I am very glad that I stumbled upon your poem, I enjoy talking to you.


ashengrayskies-lit Featured By Owner May 20, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
awee thank you that means a lot to me (:
i hope you'll go through the rest one day (:
(1 Reply)
Vixa Featured By Owner May 16, 2010
So beautiful, the imagery is absolutely breathtaking :heart:
ashengrayskies-lit Featured By Owner May 16, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
thank you so much!!
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